I'm Still Alive Folks

Been a bit since my last post. I did get my computer going again. Nothing like a nice wipe and reload. If it wasn't a bigger pain in the ass, I'd do it once a month. But after that, I had to get a little work done on me.


Last Wednesday, about 10:00 in the a.m., a friendly, quiet Dr. Grieman stuck a small needle into my hand. It was a slight pinch, but I was more curious about what was to happen soon after. I asked the doc, "So, what's actually in this stuff?"

He responded without alarm, "Well, it's basically a mixture of morphine and valium."

With a slanted smirk I reply, "Intersting. How long till it kicks in?"

"About three minutes," he began to explain. "After the first minute, you'll feel a little woozy, like you've had a couple martinis. After that, the full effects will kick in. You'll be able to respond to my questions, being semi-awake, you just won't care. And you won't remember much of what happened."

He was right. A few minutes after this banter, I don't really recall much of anything. I have some recollection of what I believe to be something like plastic plyers holding my mouth apart, and a sensation of tugging on my lower left jaw. That's about it. To me, I was just enjoying a comfortable nap in a chair until someone had the audacity to tap my shoulder and wake me from my very deep, dark, dreamless slumber.

"Feeling O.K.?" the docter asked (the man who woke me up).

"Yeah not too bad." I really didn't feel too bad at all. I couldn't feel much of anything to be honest. My sister-in-law Wendy was there to pick me up and take me home. Standing up seemed to be a little tricky however. I was still pretty woozy. Not that I'm complaining, it was like a nice, gentle drunk feeling. Almost a weightless effect. It's weird now that I recollect, that after coming under, things took a little while for me to realize what was different. I couldn't move my mouth very well, and talking didn't work to good either. This was most likely due to the fact that four wisdom teeth had been wrenched out of the back of my mouth. Other problems that I slowly came to realize was that my whole mouth region was frozen numb, and I had two giant wads of gauze in the back of my mouth as well.

Wendy took me home, where Ash was waiting with some tuna fish sandwiches. I slowly and carefully ate those with my front teeth while Wendy went and got me a smoothie and some drugs.

To move the story along, I took the next two days off from work. I couldn't really open my mouth very wide, so eating and talking were still slightly hindered. My mouth slowly leaked blood for about three days as well. But by Saturday, my jaw began to move again and the bleeding had more or less stopped. Since then, it's kind of been a back and forth between feeling really good (generally first thing in the morning) to feeling sort of stiff and sore (like right now at 10:30pm). I am recovering well, and this whole ordeal wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I'm not saying I want it to be a yearly event, but it wasn't the nightmare of pain and suffering that I've heard from others.

So here's crossing my fingers in hopes that everything in my slowly heals and resumes to feeling normal again. I think the only problem in the near future is that there seems to be a little flap of flesh that either didn't get completely cut out or sewn shut with everything else. It also could be a loose stitch. I don't know. It doesn't hurt, but if it is gum tissue, I could see food getting stuck in there and giving me grief later on. I'll just have to wait and see about that.

I'll make another update about this whole surgery and my healing process in a week or so. Hopefully I'll be fully healed by then.

Later.

Oh, and by the way, I totally milked it for all it was worth. "But Ash, I just had surgery... You're going to have to take out the garbage."

It didn't work as well as I had hoped.

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Name:Binns
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